Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Thoughts on Being Stranded in an Airport

I'm sitting in the Las Vegas airport...and my flight is delayed. My guy flew out here with me last Friday, and we had a marvelous weekend together. Then I stayed for a conference. Lucky for me, this airport has free WiFi. Here are some observations I'd like to share with you.

Pajamas are not to be worn in public. Unless you go to Wal-Mart, that seems to be a common thing there, but nowhere else is it acceptable. Certainly not the airport. If it says "Victoria's Secret," it should remain a secret. And yes, I know those are pajamas because I own a pair.

It's okay for tiny children to sleep in the aisle at the gate. Even cute. It is not okay or remotely cute for 40 year old grown adults. Also, scrunchies went out of style in 1989. So did that shade of turquoise.

Please cover your mouth when you cough and keep your Swine Flu to yourself. Old men are gross.

There's an Amish family, and I just can't stop staring at them. Why are they at an airport? Why do all Amish women have unibrows? Even if I didn't get mine waxed, they wouldn't look like that. Did they really make those dresses by hand? Amazing. I mean, they're ugly, but it's still amazing. I can barely make a sandwich.

Jersey Shore is a cultural phenomenon being discussed by people from all walks of life. Loudly. If I wanted to hear Snooki's whine, I'd turn on the TV.

I see a stranded teddy bear in the aisle next to mine. I want it.

Ew. Another old man coughing. I'm surrounded. I may contract the plague.

The woman sitting behind me literally just rested her head on my shoulder. I have got to get out of here.


CarrieAnn said...

If I could still get past security without a boarding pass, I would just go people watch at the airport. I wouldn't be able to stop staring at the Amish people either. They would probably be unlucky enough to have to sit next to me on the plane. Poor Amish people.

Irish Chick Soup said...

I dunno. I've always liked the airport. It's the airplane that I can't stand.

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