Thursday, June 26, 2008

Down with Dope. Up with Hope!

I stumbled upon this quote today by Georgia O’Keefe, who I’m mad at but that’s a whole other story. The quote is brilliant:

I don't see why we ever think of what others think of what we do - no matter who they are - isn't it enough just to express yourself...

She’s right. That should be enough. It seems to be the theme for the past couple of weeks, doesn’t it? Be true to yourself. Be happy with yourself, with what you do, what you say, how you act. And above all, be gentle with yourself because surely the rest of the world batters you around enough.

I can be very…cynical. Or no, that’s the wrong word, I’m not sure I can be cynical because that, to me, is an absolute absence of passion. No. I think that I can be very pessimistic sometimes. I either think the worst or I think the best. There’s no in between. It’s hilarious, really, this rollercoaster of emotions that I go through on a daily basis. But I do really love it about myself. I love my passion, even when it’s crazy and irrational and out of control. It’s the best way to live. Always feeling.

So, ok, back to hope. I think that when I’m pessimistic, I’m still always hopeful. I know that's an oxymoron, but somehow I manage to always hold onto hope. Sometimes I do get mad at myself for being too naïve or too optimistic. It does get me in trouble probably more often than not, but it’s who I am. I hope. I am ever hopeful.

I am hopeful that the world can be a better place, and I'm hopeful that I can play a small part in that. I am hopeful that I can be a better person. I am hopeful that things will work out for those I love. And I’m hopeful that we’ll always be close. I’m also hopeful that I’ll find what I’m looking for and that I’ll be at peace if I don't. I’m hopeful because I believe in myself. I think that’s where it comes from.

And because I believe in the good. Even when it’s hard to see it, I can see it. Just ask me. I think that it's even a conscious decision sometimes. I see what someone wishes they were instead of who they are because I'm hopeful with them that they'll become the person they want to be. Everyone has something good, worthy of value, and by loving what is lovable, we're seeing people as God sees them. Or in a situation, I see all the good that could come of it and all the beauty in a moment. And I choose to be that way. I want to be someone who believes people when they say things and doesn't assume the worst or feel suspicious. I want to be someone who believes in people and who can always see beauty. I want to enjoy people and life. And so I do.

I’m a hoper. And even when that comes back to bite me, I still feel alright cuz I'm full of hope. If you don’t have hope and faith, then you can’t have love. And I have a lot of love in me for the world and everyone in it. "Always love, hate will get you every time..."

I won’t hold anything back
And I won’t hold anything in
Feel like I know where this is going
And I might know how it ends
But I’m still willing to begin

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